Engagement Parties
Throwing an Engagement Party is a great way to celebrate your decision to get married, and also give the guests a taste of what’s to come. You’re also giving your two families a chance to meet each other and to celebrate the upcoming wedding of the happy couple! In planning your engagement party, it can be as extravagant or as low-key as you want it to be. Keep in mind though, you’ll probably want to get it out of the way pretty quickly, so you can get started on planning the big event - your wedding!
Themes
Have a think about themes. Do you want to tie your engagement party into your wedding theme? If so, you’ll need to sit down and discuss with your partner your ideas for your wedding, even at this early stage. Will you be going vintage style, or classic black and white? Will you be having a beach wedding, or and wedding in the snow? What makes you both happy? Talk about the colours you’d like to use, the flowers you’ll pick, the sort of music you’d like played. You can present this theme in your engagement party and tie it into your wedding planning, so the two events are matched.
Guests
Here you’ll need to decide what sort of Engagement Party you’d like to have. A large nighttime bash, with all your friends, family members and neighbours? Or a quite dinner out? Or even a BBQ at the beach with your nearest and dearest. Many people choose to invite the same guests they’ll be inviting to the wedding, to provide a little ‘warm up’ of what is to come on their big day. But don’t feel pressured to come up with your wedding guest list now – just invite the people you love and care for, and you will have a night (or day) to remember! However, keep in mind that people who are invited to the engagement party will ultimately expect that they will be invited to your wedding, too. Otherwise they’ll start wondering what they did to offend you! If you plan to throw a big engagement party, but will be following it with a smaller wedding, it makes sense to share this news with your guests so that there are no misunderstandings.
Your family meeting his…
Don’t forget, the primary (and traditional) idea of the Engagement Party is to introduce the two families and their respective friends to each other. Often, your families will not even have met before the Engagement Party. So in planning your party keep in mind that you want both families to feel comfortable and relaxed, and thus you might even like to appoint someone who knows most of the guests to greet and introduce people, acting as an icebreaker. Especially if the party is held at the bride’s parents’ house, as is tradition, the groom’s family members will often feel out of place. And as hosts of the party, you and your fiancé won’t have time to constantly flutter around, making sure that nobody is feeling uncomfortable.
Food
One of the most important things about your Engagement Party is the food and drinks you decide to serve. If there’s one thing people remember from these events it’s usually how amazing – or awful! – the food was. If you’re having a smaller dinner or gathering of 20 or less people, you might be able to cater for it yourselves. Or you could consider doing a pot-luck, where each guest is asked to bring a main meal or dessert to share (this is a good budget-conscious option). But anything more than 20-30 guests and you’re going to have to look into catering. Besides, as if you want any of your guests (often the mums) to be stuck in the kitchen while you’re all partying it up out on the deck! Catering is relatively simple to organise, and not terribly expensive either – just ensure that you book as soon as possible, as caterers often get booked out quickly, especially in the warmer months. In regards to alcohol and drinks it will be cheaper and easier if you buy it all yourselves in bulk or on special, and provide ice or large refrigerators for your guests. You may even look into hiring a bartender or find out if any family friends have their RSA certificates and are willing to volunteer their services for the night. You can then set up a bar and even come up with your own signature cocktail for the party!
Photography
This might not be your wedding, but you’ll definitely want to remember it through good photography! Ask around – are any of your friends or relatives amateur photographers who would like to volunteer to capture the night on film? Offer to pay them for the disc of edited photography afterwards. Or you might like to go all out and hire a professional – and why not? You’ll only ever get to have your engagement party once, and you want to make sure the special moments are captured forever.
And when all is said and done, have FUN planning your engagement party but remember – there is still a wedding to organise! You don’t want to upstage the main event by going all-out on the engagement party and finding yourself with no energy (or funds) to throw an even bigger, more exciting wedding. Just do what makes you happy and remember that your Engagement Party is about you and your wonderful partner! There are so many Engagement Party stories on our Beyond the Bride forums – why not join up?
Themes
Have a think about themes. Do you want to tie your engagement party into your wedding theme? If so, you’ll need to sit down and discuss with your partner your ideas for your wedding, even at this early stage. Will you be going vintage style, or classic black and white? Will you be having a beach wedding, or and wedding in the snow? What makes you both happy? Talk about the colours you’d like to use, the flowers you’ll pick, the sort of music you’d like played. You can present this theme in your engagement party and tie it into your wedding planning, so the two events are matched.
Guests
Here you’ll need to decide what sort of Engagement Party you’d like to have. A large nighttime bash, with all your friends, family members and neighbours? Or a quite dinner out? Or even a BBQ at the beach with your nearest and dearest. Many people choose to invite the same guests they’ll be inviting to the wedding, to provide a little ‘warm up’ of what is to come on their big day. But don’t feel pressured to come up with your wedding guest list now – just invite the people you love and care for, and you will have a night (or day) to remember! However, keep in mind that people who are invited to the engagement party will ultimately expect that they will be invited to your wedding, too. Otherwise they’ll start wondering what they did to offend you! If you plan to throw a big engagement party, but will be following it with a smaller wedding, it makes sense to share this news with your guests so that there are no misunderstandings.
Your family meeting his…
Don’t forget, the primary (and traditional) idea of the Engagement Party is to introduce the two families and their respective friends to each other. Often, your families will not even have met before the Engagement Party. So in planning your party keep in mind that you want both families to feel comfortable and relaxed, and thus you might even like to appoint someone who knows most of the guests to greet and introduce people, acting as an icebreaker. Especially if the party is held at the bride’s parents’ house, as is tradition, the groom’s family members will often feel out of place. And as hosts of the party, you and your fiancé won’t have time to constantly flutter around, making sure that nobody is feeling uncomfortable.
Food
One of the most important things about your Engagement Party is the food and drinks you decide to serve. If there’s one thing people remember from these events it’s usually how amazing – or awful! – the food was. If you’re having a smaller dinner or gathering of 20 or less people, you might be able to cater for it yourselves. Or you could consider doing a pot-luck, where each guest is asked to bring a main meal or dessert to share (this is a good budget-conscious option). But anything more than 20-30 guests and you’re going to have to look into catering. Besides, as if you want any of your guests (often the mums) to be stuck in the kitchen while you’re all partying it up out on the deck! Catering is relatively simple to organise, and not terribly expensive either – just ensure that you book as soon as possible, as caterers often get booked out quickly, especially in the warmer months. In regards to alcohol and drinks it will be cheaper and easier if you buy it all yourselves in bulk or on special, and provide ice or large refrigerators for your guests. You may even look into hiring a bartender or find out if any family friends have their RSA certificates and are willing to volunteer their services for the night. You can then set up a bar and even come up with your own signature cocktail for the party!
Photography
This might not be your wedding, but you’ll definitely want to remember it through good photography! Ask around – are any of your friends or relatives amateur photographers who would like to volunteer to capture the night on film? Offer to pay them for the disc of edited photography afterwards. Or you might like to go all out and hire a professional – and why not? You’ll only ever get to have your engagement party once, and you want to make sure the special moments are captured forever.
And when all is said and done, have FUN planning your engagement party but remember – there is still a wedding to organise! You don’t want to upstage the main event by going all-out on the engagement party and finding yourself with no energy (or funds) to throw an even bigger, more exciting wedding. Just do what makes you happy and remember that your Engagement Party is about you and your wonderful partner! There are so many Engagement Party stories on our Beyond the Bride forums – why not join up?